Posts Tagged Until

Co-Parenting Until Death Do You Part

Posted by on Thursday, 13 September, 2012

Co-Parenting Until Death Do You Part
News from Huffington Post:

For divorcing couples with young children, resolving immediate critical issues — from custody and time-share arrangements to education and religious involvement — is just the beginning of their long-term work as co-parents.

The reality is that while the martial bonds may be broken, divorced parents will be connected to each other as co-parents for the rest of their lives and through each stage of their kids’ lives — from pre-school, the turbulent teens, college and beyond. And while the marriage ended in divorce, it’s very possible for exes to be successful as co-parents. In fact, if you’re involved in a contentious divorce, it’s in your best interest to demonstrate to the court that you can be a good co-parent and are willing to facilitate a relationship between the children and the other parent, which is certainly not easy to do when you want your ex to disappear from the face of the earth.

As a divorced parent and a family law attorney, the best piece of advice I can offer is to be congenial to your ex. You’re in the co-parenting business for the long haul. You can choose to make it a painful experience or one that actually strengthens the relationship between you and your children.

How do you co-parent with someone who you may at this moment despise? For the benefit of your child, you have to set aside your…………… continues on Huffington Post

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My parents ignore and dismiss my parenting choices
News from Seattle Post Intelligencer:

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My parents frequently ignore or dismiss my parenting choices. I’ve discussed it with them many times, with no changes. The “last straw” involved their not calling when my child got sick while overnighting with them.

I’m so furious that I’d prefer to send a letter outlining the boundaries and the consequences for crossing them. I’m afraid another in-person conversation will be unproductive, and that I will say something they won’t forgive. Am I wimping out or being responsible?

— Letter vs. In-Person

Depends on how important these boundaries are to enforce. If they involve using car seats or observing health-based dietary restrictions, then you’re being responsible — and in fact I suggest you decline their next invitation to have your child overnight. If they can’t provide responsible care, then they lose the privilege.

If instead you’re clamping down on things better written off as grandparental privilege — junk food for breakfast or staying up past bedtime — then you need to think carefully about the merits of involved grandparents versus the merits of to-the-letter adherence to standards.

I realize this isn’t always an easy call, since the blown bedtime can lead to a ruined next day for you, for example. Howe…………… continues on Seattle Post Intelligencer

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