Archive for April, 2012

Parenting workshop offers caregivers a new approach

Posted by on Monday, 30 April, 2012

Parenting workshop offers caregivers a new approach
News from Poughkeepsie Journal:

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Conference to offer parenting tips
News from Deseret News:

I am a mother, and, therefore, I feel broke, tired and guilty much of the time.

Aren’t money, sleep and parenting wisdom the three things most parents need more of? We feel guilty because we have so many challenges and sometimes are lacking the tools to face those challenges. “You can’t have a snack until you’ve had real food. How many times do I have to tell you, you have to have a real lunch before you can have a snack!”

I have five children who range in age from 5 to 22. The second I think I am doing something right with one of my children and seeing real progress, another one will experience a challenge that I feel wholly ill-equipped to help him with. I need advice.

“Helping your child identify their emotions is more important than colors and ABC’s and numbers, and we neglect teaching this,” Julie Hanks, owner and clinical director of Wasatch Family Therapy, said on “A Woman’s View.” “Feelings aren’t good or bad, they’re information. So instead of lashing out, they can say, ‘I’m really mad at you, Mom.’ ”

How do I help them with that? I see them look frustrated all the time.

“You could say, ‘You look frustrated,’ ” Hanks said. “And your child might say, ‘Yeah. I want to go to my friend’s right now!’ And you could say, ‘What if we go right after lunch?’ So you could show them how to work it through.”

I am…………… continues on Deseret News

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Rosemond: Good parenting should be about husband and wife

Posted by on Sunday, 29 April, 2012

Rosemond: Good parenting should be about husband and wife
News from Greenville Daily Reflector:

Rosemond: Good parenting should be about husband and wife

A fellow in West Virginia asks, “My wife and I need to agree concerning our children. She sees things one way and I see things a completely — and I mean COMPLETELY — different way. How can we get on the same page?”

This is certainly the most serious and common of child-rearing problems. I suspect — but know of no research that backs the suspicion — that it is better for a child to be raised by a single parent than it is for a child to be raised by two people who are not of one parenting mind.

In the past, when people have asked me this question, I have said, “I don’t know. I mean, there is no pat answer. The solution depends on the two people in question, how willing they are to make compromise, and so on.”

In other words, I was thinking like a negotiator, a mediator. I was thinking that solving this problem would require that each individual give up some “territory” and accept less than what they want. But I’ve lately been giving this a lot of thought along with talking and listening to lots of people and I think I now have the pat answer people are looking for. It’s actually quite simple.

The breakthrough occurred when I realized that this problem is new. Just 50 years ago, it was rare to find parents who were not on the same page. Today, the o…………… continues on Greenville Daily Reflector

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Free parenting workshop at MHS
News from Parkersburg News:

MARIETTA – A nationally known speaker is bringing his advice on parenting to Washington County for a free workshop.

Norman Shub, clinical director of Columbus-based Gestalt Associates, will present a workshop on effective parenting from 7 to 8:30 p.m. April 30, in the auditorium of Marietta High School.

“It’s open to all of Washington County and beyond,” said Mollie Hahn, elementary guidance counselor for Marietta City Schools. “We’re welcoming whoever wants to come.”

The workshop is being presented at no cost to those in attendance or the district after Hahn signed the district up for a chance to play host to Shub during last fall’s All-Ohio Counselors Conference. Otherwise, the district could probably only afford to bring in such a program with the use of grant funding, she said.

Hahn described Shub as “a dynamic presenter” who does more than merely talk to an audience.

“He’s not just telling you; he’s working with you to help you understand,” she said.

Hahn said the program will cover topics that parents of children from pre-kindergarten to 12th grade can use.

“What he’s going to cover for us is how to set age-appropriate limits, how to focus on your child’s needs and not just the situation, the importance of avoiding shame, blame and fear; helping your child learn through struggling,” she said. “And th…………… continues on Parkersburg News

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URBAN PARENTING: Books to Remember

Posted by on Saturday, 28 April, 2012

URBAN PARENTING: Books to Remember
News from Patch.com:

My daughter is certainly old enough to read on her own now. In fact, she is reading some of the books I read at school like To Kill a Mockingbird and The Great Gatsby. She is also reading books that I only read as an adult, like The Invisble Man.

But I do remember the days of reading to her. Laying in her narrow bed with the butterfly spread, her warm body draped on me and strands of her hair tickling my check. I knew that reading to my child was supposed to be virtuous, but I did not really understand why until now.

I believed her elementary school when they encouraged parents to read to their children for thirty minutes each night. And when they circulated a list of suggested books by age. I took her to the library storytimes. I listened to other parents offer children’s books that they liked.

But I had a secret.

My daughter insisted that we read her favorite “non-classic” books. We read the same pink book about a little ballet dancer over and over. We read something maudlin about a pony. As she got older, we read “The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants”. Not destined to be a classic. But that is what she wanted to read. So I did, but I kept it our secret.

She still would love me to read her a book, but she is too old for me to share her bed and too distracted by homework, her social life, and electronics……………. continues on Patch.com

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Eliska Counce: Parenting’s Guiltiest Pleasures
News from TownSquareBuzz.com:

If you’re a parent, you know the Herculean nature of the toughest job on the planet. It’s a marathon, a Homeric journey, parenting, and it’s not glamorous work. Intensive parenting can be repetitive, dirty, exhausting, and boring. You’ve got to grab what you can to keep going, find the little rewards for yourself to stave off the occasional, nagging resentment and help make the whole endeavor a little less stressful. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the 10 most guilty pleasures of parents that help make the whole child-rearing experience a little more pleasant:

1. Kid’s leftovers. Macaroni and cheese. Fried chicken strips and nuggets. Pizza crusts (or “bones,” as we call them around here). Happy Meal cheeseburger halves. I would never buy and eat these foods for myself as often as my kids get them. Luckily, anything I shove in my mouth over the sink while cleaning up after dinner has no calories. Likewise with any leftovers. I circle my children’s half-eaten meals like a vulture. Again, if it’s half a quesadilla on a Hello Kitty plate, it doesn’t count.

2. Trashy, stupid, or R-rated TV and movies. As parenting shaves IQ points off of you, you will find great relief in stopping thinking after the children go to bed. The History Channel or NOVA will put you to sleep anyway. You will be a beaten person by the end of the day……………. continues on TownSquareBuzz.com

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Parenting the Strong-Willed Child : The Clinically Proven Five-Week Program for Parents of Two- to Six-Year-Olds, Third Edition

Parenting the Strong-Willed Child : The Clinically Proven Five-Week Program for Parents of Two- to Six-Year-Olds, Third Edition

  A clinically proven, five-week program for improving your child’s behavior Rex Forehand, Ph.D. and Nicholas Long Ph.D. have helped thousands of parents achieve discipline using positive reinforcement, without yelling or harming the child’s self-esteem. Their clinically proven, five-week program gives you the tools you need to successfully manage your child‘s behavior, giving specific factors that cause or contribute to disruptive behavior; ways to develop a more positive atmosphere in your

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Parenting Again In Southern Illinois providing help for families

Posted by on Friday, 27 April, 2012

Parenting Again In Southern Illinois providing help for families
News from Murphysboro American:

Parenting Again in Southern Illinois is in its 4th year of providing resources, counsel, and community assistance to grandparents or relatives who find themselves in the position of primary caregiver of a minor child. When the non-for profit organization founder Cathy Small suddenly found herself caring for her two oldest grandchildren, she was faced with the responsibility of seeing to all of their needs, without the legal release to do so.
“Coming from a social work/ community organizer background, I knew a lot of avenues to get help from WIC and childhood shots, to daycare and medical attention. But my husband and I didn’t have legal guardianship, so we were prevented from taking care of the girls. Both of them were sick when they came to us, one had pneumonia and a double ear infection, and they had head lice. We knew they needed immediate medical attention, and were frustrated when the doctor refused to see them.”
Not one to take no for an answer, Cathy insisted that the girls get the medical care they so desperately needed, and she and her husband proceeded to get legal guardianship of the girls. They were able to complete the adoption process a week before Easter.
“We attended a workshop at John A. Logan College each year through the Egyptian Area Agency on Aging, ‘Grandparents Raising Grandchildren.’ I knew that we were not the only people dealing w…………… continues on Murphysboro American

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Exploring Attachment Parenting
News from any book recommendations – Mothering:

Not necessarily attachment parenting focused, but falls in line with many simpler ideals for children “Einstein never used Flashcards” Great for when you are surrounded by people with kids enrolled in everything under the sun, and trying to teach them to read by 1, and you’re starting to wonder if there is another way for them to “learn”. Totally eased my anxiety about if I was doing “enough” as a parent to teach my son.

Also loved “Hold on to your Kids” Some reviews have been harsh b/c some people have interpreted it as never let your kids leave you. It actually doesn’t give that message at all , more along the lines of how important it is to reconnect and stay the most important person in your child’s life (so they don’t start looking at their friends as their moral compass etc) It’s more relevant for kids who are getting older and away from mom/dad more, but building the foundation from birth is discussed and viewed as very important obviously.

Another one is “Our babies Ourselves” by Meredith Small. She looks at different cultures and compares them to ours in regards to breastfeeding, co-sleeping etc. It’s quite fascinating, and again reinforces how so many attachment parenting ideas are just the way people live in other cultures. I loved reading how little African babies actually cry – like never! 

Dr SEars is a great…………… continues on any book recommendations – Mothering

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Parenting can be tough, but it also can be satisfying

Posted by on Thursday, 26 April, 2012

Parenting can be tough, but it also can be satisfying
News from The Newark Advocate:

Sitting in the Johnstown High School library Tuesday morning with my son, Patrick, almost was a surreal feeling.

I’ve covered high school sports for 20 years and have attended a lot of college signings for athletes playing sports in college. Never once did I think I would be one of those proud parents sitting at that table.

Usually, signing ceremonies are conducted only for athletes who are playing at the Division I level. Patrick will be attending Muskingum, a Division III school, to further his education and play basketball.

But Johnstown does signing ceremonies for any athlete who is playing a sport in college, which is a nice gesture.

So there we sat in front of several students, Patrick’s teammates and his coach, Kevin Martin. A lot of things went through my mind as we were sitting there as Johnstown athletic director Nick McIlwain was saying nice things about Patrick.

The first thought was how fast the past 12 years went by. It seemed like I was just taking him to kindergarten, and now he is a month shy of graduating.

The second thing I thought of was how proud I was of him — not because he was going to get a chance to play college basketball, but because he was receiving an academic scholarship.

As a parent, it’s your job is to give your child every opportunity to succeed. After that, it’s really up to them to se…………… continues on The Newark Advocate

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Different parenting styles? Couples still need to have each other’s backs
News from Globe and Mail:

Luke’s mother arrived home after a hard day at work. Passing the family room on her way to the kitchen, she couldn’t help but notice that it looked like a cyclone had hit. Clothes were strewn all over, but especially alarming was the sheer quantity of tortilla chip pieces scattered about the room. There were globs of what seemed to be salsa on the couch. Her teenaged son was nowhere to be seen, but music could be heard coming from his room.

More related to this story

  • All parenting styles are wrong, report says. Wait – what?
  • Disagreements over childrearing are growing cause of divorce
  • Judged by another parent? Here’s a theory on why it hurts so much

“You are grounded this weekend and ma…………… continues on Globe and Mail

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Parenting for the Perplexed: Teaching 3-year-old how to act in shul takes time …

Posted by on Wednesday, 25 April, 2012

Parenting for the Perplexed: Teaching 3-year-old how to act in shul takes time …
News from Jweekly.com:

Rachel Biale, MSW, is a Berkeley-based parenting consultant who has been working with parents of very young children for more than 25 years. Send questions through her Facebook page: Parenting Counseling by Rachel Biale or via .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).


Our 3-year-old loves going to shul, but over the past months we have realized this love does not flow from his deeply religious nature but from the chance to run wild with “The Gang of Four” — a small group of 4-year-old boys.

Our shul is very kid-friendly and has a kids’ program for part of the service, but recently we (along with the other parents of this group) have been asked to keep our kids quietly at our side. When we tell our son he has to stay with us, he throws a huge tantrum. We are on the verge of a moratorium on Shabbat at shul, but A) we don’t want to miss it (we love shul too!), and B) we don’t want to give him that kind of power. What shall we do? L.D. in San Jose

Dear L.D.: As you have seen, neither parents nor God will trump a group of 4-year-old boys in the heart of a 3-year-old. That said, you want to harness his passion in the service of fostering a lifelong love for shul and Shabbat. The question is how to allow…………… continues on Jweekly.com

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Parenting other parents has become a day at the beach
News from San Diego CityBEAT:

Aaryn Belfer

Before I let my daughter go to the home of a school friend whose a) parents I’ve never met or b) house I’ve never visited, there are a couple of things I do. First, I say no way in hell is she going over there. Then I calmly reconsider and ask the parents if they’re gun owners, and regardless of the answer, I generally say no way in hell is she going over there. Unless I’ve visited and white-gloved to my satisfaction (I recently invited myself to dinner before deciding whether Ruby could go for a sleepover), it’s more likely I’ll open my doors for the play date / sleepover / glorified babysitting stint.

And I don’t particularly care if other parents think it’s weird or over the top, just like many of them apparently don’t care if I think their laissez-faire method of child rearing is under it. And calling it laid-back is an overstated description. I never fail to be amazed by the actions of other parents.

While I’m busy bubble-wrapping my child and packing her securely in a Styrofoam box with peanuts—along with explicit instructions on how to ki…………… continues on San Diego CityBEAT

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Getting to Calm: Cool-Headed Strategies for Parenting Tweens + Teens

Getting to Calm: Cool-Headed Strategies for Parenting Tweens + Teens

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Parenting 101 is all around us, just watch

Posted by on Wednesday, 25 April, 2012

Parenting 101 is all around us, just watch
News from Natchez Democrat:

Published 12:09am Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Our house played host to a parenting 101 seminar this weekend, and my husband and I took a few notes.

– Know when to push your children

-Know when to swoop in and protect

– Stay tirelessly attentive

– Support your spouse as you support your child

– Motivate

– Protect

– Provide

– And, when the time is right, let go

It was child rearing in a nutshell, or should a say a beak full?

We didn’t realize such a loving couple had moved into the Mississippi-shaped birdhouse in our back yard.

I’m sure they had come and gone countless times in the last few months, but we are busy folks, and frankly, we don’t really stop often to smell the roses or watch the birds.

But Saturday was different for both loving couples — the Carolina Wrens and Kevin and I.

The wrens were causing quite the ruckus, and Kevin and our dog Suzy noticed first.

Mom and dad wren were tripling their frequent flyer miles from the top of our wooden fence to the ground it encases. And something or someone down below was crying.

It didn’t take long to realize that our dogs — the avid hunter and the lazy bum — must begin serving their time on house arrest.

We had a baby bird to help protect, after all.

So we h…………… continues on Natchez Democrat

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Parenting: Enjoying the finish line – happiness in the here and now
News from Christian Science Monitor:

Parenting can be a search for your kid’s next milestone, rather than reveling in the happiness of the here and now, or that finish line of the moment.

A common happiness hurdle is the arrival fallacy. We think that we’ll be happy once we arrive at some destination: a new job, a new apartment, a promotion, whatever. But often, arriving doesn’t make us as happy as we expect.

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Gretchen Rubin

Guest blogger

Gretchen Rubin is the author of the No. 1 New York Times bestseller “The Happiness Project” and the forthcoming “Happier at Home.” She started her career in law and was clerking for Ju…………… continues on Christian Science Monitor

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This is a video response to the father who shot his daughters laptop to prove a point after she publicly complained over doing her chores. For anyone wanting to accuse me of just riding on the shirt tails of the original viral video you would be correct. I am trying to use any attention I can harness to bring awareness to the cause of Childhood cancer and to put a stop to it. Please do not post negative comments or dislike the video as it will just hurt our cause. I am not stating he is a bad parent as I do not know him at all but he could have handled the situation much better in my opinion. We ALL make mistakes though. In fact after viewing his FB page I believe he is a good parent that just made a mistake in reacting with his video without thinking the consequences thru. Todays youth are not a spoiled generation no more than previous ones in my opinion. It takes consistent and tireless efforts to raise a respectful and obedient child thru positive reinforcement and loving interaction along with thoughtful discipline and not waiting until you cannot tolerate a child’s behavior any longer and then reacting to it in a manor that brought worldwide attention to his family of which he most likely would not rather have. I tried to think of a way of using a firearm to make a point and this is the best I could come up with. Please follow the link to go to St Baldrick’s to help in the fight against Childhood cancer. Children are dyeing each and every day at an alarming rate and

Quincy Community Action Program to offer parenting class

Posted by on Tuesday, 24 April, 2012

Quincy Community Action Program to offer parenting class
News from Boston.com:

Quincy Community Action Programs Inc. will bring back its parenting conference this year to help families around the region find innovative ways to raise their kids.

The organization last held such a conference in 1999, and since then, funding has been short to provide the free program.

However, with a grant from the Massachusetts Department of Early Education’s Coordinated Family and Community Engagement, and with a new space available at the Archie and Rosemary Wahlberg Early Learning Center in Quincy, which just opened in January, the time is right to bring the conference back to the South Shore.

“It’s a great opportunity for parents to come together and listen to some important information on parenting,” said Joan Rodeck, program assistant to the Quincy/Braintree Family Network. “They can strength their parenting skills, and it can be a supportive environment.”

Saturday’s event will feature motivational speaker Ellen Rogers at the beginning of the workshop.

Rogers brings a unique perspective, having gone from a “never-present” mother to an “always-present” mother after her son was disabled in a devastating car accident.

“She’s an inspirational [person] and we want this to be an uplifting event. We want people to see their strengths as parents as well as getting s…………… continues on Boston.com

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Silence, inner sanctimommy! I’m trying to find a parenting style
News from Christian Science Monitor:

Don’t put your baby on my dinner table, please, my inner sanctimommy said as I was on the way to finding a parenting style.

There was an evening in the early 1990s that we had a dinner party, and the couple with a newborn put the baby – in its bouncy chair – on my set dinner table. 

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There was no request to put the baby on the table where we were going to eat, just the parental assumption that because the baby was the centerpiece of their life, it would be OK to make it the centerpiece of my dinner party.

I was socially paralyzed. Cute baby; wonderful baby; amazing baby. But this was a dinner party of adults who, heretofore, had met regularly and had wonderful conversations over leisurely dinners.

What was I going to say? Nothing.

What was I going to do? I became a silent – but studious – observer of parenting differences, taking notes that would amount, ultimately, to my own internal parenting manual for that time in my early 40s when my husband and I finally did become parents.

That dinner par…………… continues on Christian Science Monitor

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Shared parenting merely a starting point

Posted by on Sunday, 22 April, 2012

Shared parenting merely a starting point
News from Columbus Dispatch:

Sunday April 22, 2012 5:52 AM

Q: I have been told that shared parenting is now automatic in Ohio. Is that true? My husband has had very little time for the children. But, now that we’re going through a divorce, he talks as if he wants to be “father of the year.”

Will the judge award him shared parenting just because he has seen the light?

A: Your question raises several issues worth considering.

First, a person is not awarded shared parenting as a prize for winning a fight. Rather, shared parenting is a method of parenting ordered by some judges to recognize a means of providing for children that makes them winners — not just the parents. In other words, it is a way of acknowledging that children need both parents.

Shared parenting is not automatic in Ohio. Yet many judges and magistrates believe that such an arrangement is the best place to start — and that someone must prove why it will not be in the best interests of children. Custody, on the other hand, is determined on a case-by-case basis.

Shared parenting is a method of acknowledging to your children that both parents love them and that both accept responsibility for their futures. It does not mean that children are treated as rubber balls…………… continues on Columbus Dispatch

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Indifferent parenting is showing
News from Postnoon:

Ansh Agarwal, a 16-year-old Class XI student was lynched by 30 people who were all more or less in the same age group as him. Many among them were minors. The reason was said to be an SMS sent to Ansh’s girlfriend by Siddhant Ghosalkar. Ansh went over to Siddhant’s house to confront him on this. An inevitable heated argument turned physical. Siddhant, along with 30 friends, chased down Ansh and the gang beat him to death, while passersby just looked on. The whole of Mumbai was shocked. Of the 30, eight have been arrested. The residents of the locality protested against the crime.

This is not an isolated case; in another one reported from Odisha, nine minor boys were arrested a week ago in the rape case of a 17-year-old girl. Horrific incidents involving teenagers are becoming too frequent to be ignored. We have been complacent till now as we brushed away violent acts committed by children as things that happen only in the West and hitherto believed that our children are impervious to such behaviour.

This complacency comes from the confidence we have in our Indian culture where obedience, respect of elders, good neighbourliness and even sacrifice are accepted as instilled virtues. As members o…………… continues on Postnoon

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Positive Parenting With Love: 92 Tips On How To Be A Good Parent And Raise Happy, Confident Kids And Teens

Positive Parenting With Love: 92 Tips On How To Be A Good Parent And Raise Happy, Confident Kids And Teens

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Also included…you will receive, completely free…

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Madonna’s daughter smoking: Photo sparks parenting discussion (+video)

Posted by on Friday, 20 April, 2012

Madonna’s daughter smoking: Photo sparks parenting discussion (+video)
News from Christian Science Monitor:

Madonna’s daughter smoking? Admitting she’s not “tough enough” on her 15-year-old Lourdes, the superstar talks bout parenting strategies as a single mother of four.

In a snapshot that quickly made the tabloids, Madonna’s daughter, 15-year-old Lourdes Leon Ciccone, is scene smoking a cigarette with friends on a Manhattan street. The singer’s eldest daughter, a LaGuardia High School sophomore, made headlines in The New York Daily News, under the headline, “Oh Lordy, Lourdes!”

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Friends for Life? Wait Till Kids Enter the Picture
News from New York Times:

JoJo Whilden/Roadside Attractions

From left, Chris O’Dowd, Kristen Wiig, Adam Scott, Jennifer Westfeldt, Maya Rudolph and Jon Hamm in “Friends With Kids.”

NOTHING can sink a friendship like differences over parenting. Sometimes the areas of disagreement are stark and dramatic, leading to blowups and out-and-out breaks. Most of the time they’re subtle and unstated, a matter of dark looks and long-simmering resentments, that erode, rather than rupture, formerly close relationships. Often they arise from a vague sense of betrayal, a friend’s having changed once he or she has had children, breaking unspoken assumptions about shared values and goals, how to live and…………… continues on New York Times

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